“Today?” I spun around to stare open mouthed at Angel.

Today? My mind echoed, still struggling to grasp what he was saying.

He shrugged. “I didn’t see the point in delaying it any longer.”

“You just told me you were moving the wedding up yesterday. I haven’t even received my dress yet. It only arrives in a couple of weeks.” My head was already spinning with every reason why our wedding couldn’t go ahead as he had planned.

It was crazy. Right? He was crazy. This couldn’t be happening. Their dress wasn’t ready, we hadn’t picked a venue, flowers hadn’t been chosen. The list for every reason we couldn’t marry today was endless.

“We are going to marry today Kira.” His tone determined and unwavering.

He was clearly mad. There was no way.

My knees felt shaky so I moved to sink down at the edge of the bed. “But I have nothing to wear.”

“I remember you saying you didn’t care what you wore. Garbage bag comes to mind.”

He was right, it had been an offhand comment. No woman wanted to get married in a trash bag no matter what the circumstance of the nuptials.

“You know I didn’t mean that,” I shot back at him.

“You have an hour before the ceremony.”

An hour? My mouth fell open, and my mind went blank.

“You’re already wasting valuable time,” he said as he exited the bedroom. “You’ll find your garbage bag hanging in the closet.”

I frowned. Was he trying to be funny?

I looked after him still trying to grapple with the realization that today he would become my husband. It did something weird to the middle of my chest but I didn’t have time to analyze it.

Irritated, I went to the walk in closet and stopped in my tracks. The dress I had chosen hung in my closet with a matching pair of shoes. Something constricted in my chest and I took a moment to breathe normally again.

The dress fit perfectly. I felt like a fairytale princess, even if my wedding was tainted by reality.

There wasn’t time to do anything but wear my hair down.

There was no time to think about what this day would mean, the only thing on my mind was trying to make the most I could out of what I had readily available to get myself ready.

Just under an hour later there was a knock on the bedroom door. I opened it to find James waiting for me on the other side. I had managed to get dressed and put some make up on but I was no where near as ready as I wanted to be but I would have to do.

“I’m here to escort you for the ceremony,” he said. He offered me his elbow and I linked my arm through his.

“Let’s go,” I said as he led me out the room and then out of the house.

“Are we having it outside?” I asked, trying to figure out exactly where we were headed. He nodded.

Honestly I had expected it to take place inside the house, even in Angel’s study. This was unexpected.

He led me to the pond on the edge of the property as we moved past the trees surrounding the water I saw an Angel with a priest and a couple of other guys. He stood under a wooden arch that was interweaved with my favorite flowers, white lilies. The sight was unexpected and took my breath away.

Angel had never looked more handsome in a tux. My heart swelled. It was getting harder to ignore the emotion he created in me when he was near.

James stood beside his boss as Angel took my hand into his. His touch warm and assuring. I took a breath trying to get myself together.

“It’s beautiful,” I murmured, feeling overwhelmed. The setting beside the pond where had spent countless hours as children seemed to be perfect, even if it wasn’t a traditional marriage.

“It’s not the big wedding I had planned but with the time constraints it was the best I could do at short notice.”

My throat clogged with emotion. I remembered the time I had spent chasing butterflies while Angel had looked for frogs to scare me with.

“It’s perfect,” I assured him. In my mind it was better than any wedding we could have planned. “As long as there aren’t any frogs.”

He smiled. “No frogs.”

The indescribable feeling filling my chest made it impossible to speak as I stared up at Angel.

It was a combination of all the small things he had done that had come together to create a very thoughtful setting to our wedding. The dress, the place, the flowers and the familiarity of our childhood.

The priest cleared his throat. “Are we ready to begin?”

Angel took both my hands in his and held them as we turned to the priest. “We are ready,” he said.

There had been countless times I had questioned whether marriage to Angel was the right thing to do but in that moment I couldn’t remember a reason not to.

It was difficult not to repeat the words the priest spoke without some emotion and my heart continued to swell as Angel spoke his vows softly but clearly. Speaking them out aloud, gave them more weight than any fairytale I had ever dreamed up as a little girl.

I swallowed hard when Angel slid a wedding band on my finger.

When it was my turn I tried to keep the emotion I was feeling from filtering into my voice. Jack gave me the wedding band I had gotten for Angel. I slid it onto his finger as I repeated the same vows, unable to look him straight in the eye, instead I kept my gaze on his hand in mine.

It was then, just before the priest announced we were husband and wife I finally realized the emotion I was experiencing as Angel’s lips pressed against mine. I loved him. The realization sent me spiraling.

Somewhere along the line, I had fallen in love with him. Had it been there before from when we were younger or had it only happened now? I couldn’t tell.

It wasn’t impossible to believe that his actions through my childhood had made me fall in love with him. When I had needed someone, he had always been there. I didn’t have a memory of him abandoning me like my family had.

I was stunned as he put his hand on my waist and lifted his lips from mine. My hand touched to his chest as his eyes held mine. Could he see how I felt? It felt like it was written in neon across my forehead?

I was dazed as a photographer took some photos of us before Angel led me back to the house with my hand in his.

Maria had put together a beautiful assortment of foods. I excused myself to the nearest bathroom to try and compose myself. I was shaking, the emotion I was experiencing I couldn’t ignore or talk away.

I put my hand to my forehead and took a shaky breath. It didn’t matter how I had gotten to this, what mattered was what I was going to do. It would be so easy to let myself feel what I did for him but it would be detrimental to me if I allowed myself to believe for even a second that he could return the feelings I had for him.

How did I protect myself? But it was too late. I was already in love with him and nothing was going to change that. I let out an emotional breath. How had I been stupid enough to fall in love with someone who was incapable of loving anyone?

I patted my face with some water to bring myself back to the present and get myself to stop thinking about my feelings for Angel. One thing was for sure I didn’t want him to know and if I couldn’t get myself under control, he would be able to see it.

He was someone who used every advantage to get what he wanted and he would use my love for him to get me to do whatever he wanted. If I had any chance of holding my own I would have to keep my emotions from him. He couldn’t find out, no matter what.

I fisted the hand with with my engagement and wedding band. I was his wife and I had to find a way to be with him and not let him break my heart.

He had made it crystal clear that there would be no declarations of love from him, and I wasn’t naive enough to believe there was anything I could do to change that.

He would protect me, he would keep me safe, he would care for me but he would never love me the way I loved him. The thought filled me with a sudden sadness and it took a moment to catch my breath.

I expelled a breath to rid myself of the feeling that there was nothing I could do to change what had happened.

The most important thing was to make sure he didn’t find out. I would have to keep the feelings buried so deep that I would forget I even had them. It was not only for my heart but for my survival.

I expected Angel to excuse himself and go back to his study but he didn’t. In fact he never left my side.

Maria had baked us a small wedding cake and we cut it together. A photographer took some photos. It would be nice to have some memories from the day to keep.

There were moments I felt a pang of guilt for the fact that Kaiden hadn’t been there. Even though I argued he was dead set against the union, I still felt bad. I wondered how he was going to react to the news. It probably wasn’t going to go down well.

Would he have done something to stop it if he had known about the low key ceremony? I wouldn’t put it past my brother to do everything he could to stop what he felt wasn’t in my best interest. But it was my life and I got to make my choices, even if he didn’t agree with them.

Maybe it would be better for me to tell him, then for him to find out in another way. I would call him tomorrow and let him know. I felt better that I had come to some resolution about Kaiden so I let the guilt go.

I was no blushing virgin but when we finally went upstairs I felt nervous and I couldn’t figure out why. We had already been intimate, it wasn’t like he hadn’t seen it all before but this time seemed different for some reason.

Was it the fact that I now realized loved him that made things different?

I slid my high heels off and returned them to the closet. When I reentered the bedroom Angel had loosened his tie and his jacket was off. He loosened the cuffs and rolled up the sleeves.

I hated how nervous I felt. I didn’t want to feel different around him but I couldn’t simply just turn off my emotions. Finding a way to deal with him in the same way I had before was my top priority. I wouldn’t allow him to control me with my heart.

He walked to where I stood. 

“You’re safe now Kira. No one would dare harm my wife.” 

Our eyes met. Wife. I was now his wife. The word felt foreign to me. Would I ever get used to it?

Our lives had always been intertwined but I would never have predicted this outcome for us. And as much as I was his, he was mine.

I held onto the small thing that he had done that day to make it special for me. I looked down at the dress and touched it with the hand glittered with the pink diamond engagement ring and wedding band. My heart felt like it was going to burst. His hand touched mine and I lifted mine to meet his.

His gaze sent an awareness through me. Bringing me to life, my skin under his touch.

What would it feel like to be able to give into the emotions that tormented me? To be able to love him like my heart craved, instead of hiding it so deep inside I felt numb. Why did everything have to be so hard? Why did I have to fight what I wanted the most?

“You were very quiet today. It was unlike you.” He missed nothing. He studied me.

“It was a lot today.” I swallowed nervously, hoping he wouldn’t see how I truly felt about him. “I never imagined I would be trying to get ready for my wedding in an hour.”

“I had complete trust in you.” His words were light but that lifted me up.

“Thank you for the dress. It was a nice surprise.” His hand was still on mine. Only he mattered when he touched me, my heart wanted to open up and flourish in the warmth of the feeling he created in me. But I fought the urge.

“Did you really believe I was going to let you wear a garbage bag to our wedding?” he asked softly.

I shrugged. “Honestly, I wasn’t sure.”

“You took my breath away today.”

How was I supposed to fight how I felt when he said things like that?

“You don’t have to say things like Angel. I know what kind of a marriage this and I don’t need you to make it into something it isn’t.”

“Our marriage will be real Kira. I meant my vows.”

“But you don’t love me.”

He frowned. “I don’t know why you get to hung up on a fickle emotion that is usually confused with lust.”

That wasn’t true. Just allowing myself to feel a fraction of the love I had for him lifted me to the heavens. If he had ever been in love he would know what it felt like.

“Maybe I crave something I feel like I missed out on growing up.” I sighed. “After my mother died I felt so lost, my father certainly didn’t make me feel loved and Kaiden…well he was too busy with his own life to see that I was floundering.”

His hand tightened on mine and I found myself staring into his eyes. “I was there.”

My heart constricted causing a physical pain as well as an emotional one.

“You were,” I found myself whispering as our gazes locked and I was unable to think of anything but how close he was to me.

He pulled me close and I looked up to him. My eyes went to his lips and I wanted him to kiss me so bad.

“You will never be alone, I will always be there.”

It was the most romantic thing he had ever said to me and my heart soared. How was I supposed to keep my love for him under wraps when he declared things like that?

He kissed me and I held onto his shirt as his tongue explored my mouth before sliding against mine. My fist tightened on his shirt and pulled him closer.

I needed him, more than the air that filled my lungs with each breath.

I pressed my body up against his, my breasts flattening against his chest.

He lifted his mouth from mine to turn me around. I put my hands to my waist as he began to undo the dress and then he slid it down. His mouth touched my shoulder as the garment dropped to the floor. I closed my eyes and rode out the sensation, feeling it cover my entire body. Making every touch more sensitive.

His mouth trailed up the side of my neck and I arched to give him better access. His hands went to my waist and I turned to lift myself up on my tiptoes to kiss him. Linking my hands around his neck I groaned.

I wanted to stay just in the moment, never leaving the bubble of want that coursed through me and or the love that beat within me for the man who was now my husband. A foreign feeling of possessive settled over me.

He was mine. And I was his.

Our mouths fused together as our hands worked at undressing each other.

Once we were both free from the confines out our clothes, he lowered me to the bed and I gazed at him. Allowing myself to feel every heart flutter as his body covered mine.

Between heat, touch and panting he got protection on before he joined our bodies together. I held onto him as his body moved within mine. My mind soared with every hope while my heart beat solely for him.

He knew my body so well. He knew what every touch would illicit and how far to push before I tumbled over the edge. My fingers dug into his skin as I let out a long groan while the orgasm washed over me.

It wasn’t long and he shuddered into me. I held him close, our bodies gleaming from sweat.

He made a move to lift his body from mine but I refused to let him go. “Just lie here with me. Just for a little while.”

“I’ll be just a minute.” He went to the bathroom and then reappeared moments later to join me in the bed again.

His eyes held mine and he lay beside me, pulling me closer. I lay my head on his chest and inhaled the scent of him, trying to engrain every moment I had with him so I would never lose this moment with him.

His lips touched my forehead and I closed my eyes, allowing myself to believe, just for that moment that he loved me as much as I loved him. That our union was only about love and nothing else. There was no one out to get me, there was no danger ahead.

I lay my hand on his chest and could feel the steady beat of his heart.

I replayed his voice in my mind, saying his marriage vows. I let myself believe every word, promising myself that when the sun came up the next morning I would let it go and be content with whatever he could give me. Not allowing him to see how much I loved him, hiding it so deep it never saw the light of day.