I was emotionally and physically exhausted when Max dropped me off at home. He promised to collect me in the morning to take me to pick up my car.

“It’s dark and late. I don’t want you driving now, it’s not safe,” he argued when I expected him to take me back to the party.

It was nice for someone to take control so I didn’t have to worry. Or maybe it was the fact that someone was worrying about me and not the other way around.

I went straight to bed. My eyes were closed before I could even pull my covers over myself.

It was bright when I woke up. I had a headache which had nothing to do with alcohol and more to do with stress. I lay in my bed and thought back to the night before. It was difficult not to look at Max differently when he had stepped in without lecturing to help me when I hadn’t been able to get hold of Aiden.

There was no way I had ever imagined this happening, it was strange how things had worked up.

I saw a message from Aiden but I didn’t have the energy to deal with him when I still had to go and fetch my car.

I check the time, it was nearly ten. Max had sent me a message to say he would be around in half an hour to fetch me so I got up and showered. I changed and brushed my teeth then I pulled a brush through my hair.

It was the sound of car pulling up in front of my house than had me hurtling down the stairs so Max didn’t have to wait for me.

It was only when I opened the door did I the sight of Aiden getting out of his car stopped me in my tracks.

Oh no. This couldn’t be happening. I checked the time. It was nearly ten and Max would be showing up any minute.

I didn’t need anymore drama than I had already experience the night before trying to get Lacey home.

His eyes met mine as he walked to me. I held my breath. He was breathtaking. His broad shoulders rolled slightly like he was preparing for a confrontation. The sight of him still It was difficult to tell what was going on his head as he approached me.

“You’re not talking to me?” he asked, softly.

His expression and tone made me feel bad. But he hadn’t answered my calls.

“I called you last night.” I put my hands on my hips but made a point of changing my stance to ensure this conversation went quickly Aiden would be gone by the time Max showed up.

Even though it was innocent, even I knew there would be an issue if they showed up at the same time. It was something I would rather avoid at all costs.

He shoved his hands into the pockets of his jeans. “I was mad when you wouldn’t take my calls.” He shrugged.

I don’t know how we had got to this. We had been so good and in sync before. I couldn’t figure out what was going wrong but I knew I had to get rid of him before Max arrived.

“I’m on my way out,” I said, rocking on the balls of my feet, feeling more agitated with each passing moment. “Can I come over a little later and we can talk?”

He nodded solemnly.

It was awkward. I wanted to kiss his cheek and hug him goodbye but I didn’t.

He turned and was about to head back to his car when Max pulled up behind his car.

I wanted the ground to open up and swallow me whole. This could not be happening. I just needed one thing to go right, just one thing.

Aiden stopped and tension filled his stance as Max got out of his car, Aiden stiffened before turned to face me. His eyes accusing. “You gonna explain this?”

To be able to explain this would entail telling him about Reece, I hesitated. Struggling with trying to salvage my relationship with Aiden and protect my best friend’s secret.

“It’s not what you think,” I began to explain.

His eyebrows shot up. “Are you sure? Because you’re ex boyfriend just showed up after you told me you had something to do this morning?”

His hands fisted. He was really angry. Could I really blame him? If I had been in his shoes wouldn’t I have felt the same?

“You were trying to get me to leave before he got here?”

The question hung between us.

It was impossible not to feel some sort of guilt.

“It’s not what you think. There is nothing going on between us Aiden. You have to believe me.” I moved closer hoping I could talk him around before this situation escalated.

He held up his hands and backed away from me while shaking his head. He stormed off to his car and I was left open mouthed, unsure of how to fix this.

“She’s not your yours anymore.” He yelled at Max.

Max rolled his shoulders and I hurried to get between them to try and defuse the situation.

“Really? Because I’m the one she called when she needed help,” Max shot back.

Aiden moved so quickly all I could do was gasp.

He swung and hit Max. I gasped, putting my hands to my mouth.

Max worked his jaw and Aiden rubbed his fist.

“Aiden.” I whispered. I didn’t know this side of him.

“I’m out of here,” he mumbled before stalking to his car. He got in slamming the door.

I was at a loss for words as I watched him drive away, wheels squealing like he couldn’t get out of there fast enough. I was shaken.

“You okay?” Max’s voice pulled my attention back to him. He stood bedside me still nursing his jaw.

“Let’s get some ice for that,” I said and led him back into the kitchen to find a bag of frozen peas.

“Here,” I handed him the bag.

He sat down at the kitchen table and slowly pressed the cool bag to his jaw.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t know he was coming over. We had a bit of an argument last night,” I murmured, my mind was still trying to process what had happened and how things had escalated.

“I should apologize. I shouldn’t have said what I said.” He sighed. “It’s hard to see you and still feel so strongly about you. He doesn’t know what he has…but I do.”

It was too late. Whatever I had felt for Max was long gone and even if Aiden I were having issues I still loved him. I could be mad and angry but it didn’t change how I felt.

“I shouldn’t have called you last night.” Even if it had been my only option.

“I know things with Aiden are rocky and I know it’s going to be difficult to maintain any kind of friendship but I want you to know that if you ever need help, I will always be there for you.”

He was a good guy. Just not the guy I needed.

“You didn’t do anything wrong Max.” He needed to understand that Aiden and I getting together had nothing to do with him. I didn’t believe there was anything he could have done to stop it.

“You are a great guy and boyfriend. Honestly it wasn’t you. It was just the situation and the pressure of it. Everything was so stressful and to have someone that was in the same position and understood what you were going through. That’s what brought us together and then everything else happened.”

I still didn’t like to talk about it, I still carried so much guilt.

Aiden and my shared experienced had brought us together but not even similar circumstances alone could have caused it. It was an attraction with the right set of circumstances that had led to things with Aiden.

“I feel like I didn’t show you how important you were to me.” He sighed.

“You did,” I assured him. “This wasn’t about you or anything you didn’t do.” I shrugged. “You have to let that go Max.”

I let out an emotional breath. After everything Aiden and I had been through I felt like we were ruining our only chance to be together but I didn’t know how to fix it.

I was still trying to figure out how to approach the situation with Aiden. Did I give him time to cool off or did I go and sort this out now?

Max took me to pick up my car.

“Thanks,” I said as I got in and he stood beside it.

“You’re welcome Reece.”

“You deserve better than I treated you and I hope you find someone who can see how wonderful you are.”

He nodded. “Maybe if Lacey hadn’t been sick, we wouldn’t be here.”

There was no undoing what had happened.

“I’m sorry Max.”

He sighed and hung his head. “It sucks but it is what it is.”

I was relieved he was finally accepting that we were over. Even if things didn’t work out with Aiden, we would not be getting back together.

“I know it sounds like a line but it’s true. When you meet the right girl, you’ll wonder why ever wasted a second of regret with me.”

Maybe this thing was Aiden was just a matter of time and it would have eventually happened if Lacey hadn’t had her tumor.

Max, was nice and dependable. He was what I had needed at that point in time but deep down I knew it wouldn’t have lasted. I had always needed the hot, can’t keep your hands off each other type of attraction. The way I felt about Aiden.

He lifted his eyes to meet mine. “I hope he makes you happy.”

“Thanks,” I murmured, not sure if it was possible to fix things with Aiden.

I loved him and he wanted to be with me. Why wasn’t it that simple? It was the only factors that counted, surely?

With a hot and heavy attraction usually came with a volatility that would end up tearing it apart. The odds weren’t good for Aiden and I.

I left and went home. For most of the journey home I debated whether to go to Aiden’s house.

I didn’t know if I could do another confrontation or handle him but I decided it was best to go and see him.

When I got to his house, his car wasn’t on the driveway which meant he wasn’t home. I sat in the car for a few minutes trying to debate on whether to call him or not. It was then I saw his message he had sent before he had showed up unexpectedly at my house.

We need to talk. I’m coming over.

If I read his message I would have been able to avert the confrontation that had taken place and the drama that it had created.

I sighed heavily as I called him and put the phone to my ear. It rang and rang. Then is just stopped.

I wasn’t surprise. He was probably not answering because he was still angry. How did I clear up the misunderstanding if he refused to speak to me?

Camping outside of his house until he came home wasn’t feasible. I still had assignments to do. Maybe once I was done I would try and call him or message him. If all else failed I could always sneak into his room like I had before.

It was my absolute last resort. I swallowed when I remembered his expression before he had left. It turned my stomach. All I could do was explain myself and hope for the best. I couldn’t do more than that.

I found it difficult to concentrate on my homework when I got home. My mind kept drifting to Aiden and I kept checking my phone. But there was no contact from me.

Eventually to give ease my anxiousness I sent him a message.

Please can we talk.

I sighed and stared down at my homework, trying to find the energy to concentrate on the task at hand and not the boy who was foremost in my thoughts.

I was still busy with my homework when Lacey called.

“How are you feeling?” I asked, trying to keep my voice light when I had to fight the urge to want to lecture her.

“Hungover,” she murmured.

I could hear the hesitation in her voice and knew that she was probably feeling bad she had gotten so drunk.

“You drank a lot last night,” I said.

“I know. I’m sorry. What happened?”

“Not much. I got you home safe.” She didn’t need to know all the details. “Maybe next time we go for a movie, or something like that.”

“Yeah, if I survive this hangover.”

I smiled. “You’ll survive,” I murmured. After everything she had survived, what was a little hangover?

Making her feel bad wouldn’t accomplish anything. She had been to hell and back. Maybe she deserved some time to figure things out and hopefully remember everything she had forgotten.

I couldn’t imagine was Adonis was going through.

It made me think of Aiden.

I made a point of checking my phone again, even though I knew there wasn’t anything from him. I tried to call him again. It rang and rang. When it finally clicked over to voicemail, I hung up.

This wasn’t working. If I wanted his attention I was going to have to do something drastic. Like sneaking into his room again. But the fear of it not playing out well kept me from heading there straight away.

My confidence was shaken, and I wasn’t sure how to fix what was broken.

All my responsibilities felt like weight on my shoulders and I hung my head into my hands, taking a deep breath and expelling it.

What did I do now? My attention drifted to my phone on the table.

I reached for it and dialed his number again. I didn’t expect him to answer but this time when it clicked over to voicemail, I didn’t hang up.

“It’s me. I’ve been trying to speak to you but..um you’re not answering.” I paused. “I know you’re angry and upset but you owe me the chance to explain. You owe me that much Aiden.” I sighed. “I don’t want to throw what we have away over some stupid misunderstanding that can be explained, you have to give me the chance to explain Aiden.”

I’d said all I could. I ended the call. Feeling emotional, I let out a heavy breath. I didn’t want to consider what would happen if he didn’t give me the chance to hear me out.

There was nothing more I could do. The ball was in his court.

I tried to finish my homework as best I could. After the drama from the night before and the subsequent morning I was tired. And each moment that passed felt like an eternity. The more time that passed, the less likely I believed Aiden would be to talking this out.

Later when I was tucked into bed, in the dark it was impossible to still keep up any hope that Aiden would give me the opportunity to speak to him. I couldn’t make him do anything, all I could do at this point was wait and hope for the best.

It just sucked, that nothing that was happening was in my control.

It just compounded the lack of control I’d had when Lacey had been sick, and in her recovery. It felt like I wasn’t getting anywhere and was only treading water. Trying to keep my head above the water.

I lay in bed and stared at the ceiling, trying to figure out what I could have done differently so have changed the outcome I was currently facing.

Had my inability to realize how much I cared for Aiden in the first place the start of all the mistakes that had led to this? If I had been more confident in the beginning and not waited so long to tell him how I felt, would he have felt more secure in our fledgling relationship. Would it have helped with withstand the insecurities Max’s presence had created?

I fell into a troubled sleep, going over all the mistakes and wondering if there was anything I could do to change any of what had happened.