A week went by without a word from Aiden. I had kind of resigned myself to the fact that we were over. It was difficult to pick myself up and carry on. The disappointment and heartache made it harder to get through each day.

Every time he crept into my thoughts while the rawness in my chest ached, it was not just an emotional pain. It was so deep, I felt it on a physical level.

And as much as I wanted to, I couldn’t stay in bed with the covers over my head and ignoring everything else other than my personal pain. Life didn’t stop, so I plastered a smile on when I had to pretending everything was fine when it wasn’t.

Sleep didn’t come easy and everyday was tougher than the last. Luckily, Lacey hadn’t wanted to go out this weekend so at least I didn’t have to spend a night or two watching over her, making sure she didn’t make a mistake she couldn’t come back from.

And I managed to get on top of my course work. I was finally feeling like I was keeping my head above water.

But then I got a call from my father.

“What’s up?” I asked, very aware that he didn’t usually call me during college.

“It’s your mom, she fainted and bumped her head.”

I stopped. The panic set in.

“Is she okay?” I was already heading straight for the parking lot.

“The doctor is checking her out,” he answered.

“Where are you?” I asked, trying to fight my way through the debilitating panic.

“We are in the emergency room. She has bumped her head pretty hard. She may have a concussion.”

I could hear the echo of my blood pumping through my veins as I fished my keys from my bag and tried to open the car door.

My mind already trying to figure out the quickest way to the hospital.

“Princess.”

The mention of my nickname made me stop.

“I need you to go home and pack a bag for your mom. She will need to stay in the hospital overnight.”

I nodded, releasing the breath I held.

“She’ll be okay,” he assured me.

“Just message me everything you think she will need and I’ll be there as soon as I can.”

“I will. Drive safely.”

When the call ended I took a shaky breath trying to get myself together so I could do what I needed to.

Just the mention of the word hospital brought back memories of the stress of worrying about Lacey and what had driven me straight into Aiden’s arms.

I took a moment to take a long breath and release in a controlled count to four. I had to calm myself down before I got behind the wheel.

By the time I got home I was a bundle of nerves. My father sent me a message wish everything mom needed.

I hurried into the house and climbed the stairs two at a time throwing my bag into my room as I passed it on the way to my parent’s room.

My mind was scattered as I rushed around the room grabbing things on the list my father had messaged me.

When I was sure I had everything I raced downstairs only to stop as I got to the bottom of the stairs. Aiden was standing in the open door way.

Had I left the front door open? I tightened my hold on the duffel bag I held as my eyes met Aiden’s.

“The front door was wide open.” His wore a white shirt and jeans. His expression unreadable.

I didn’t have time for this. My chest rose and fell with every hurried breath.

“I can’t do this now,” I said as I got my car keys out my jean pockets. It was then I realized I was missing my phone. I had left it upstairs.

I dropped the bag and went upstairs. It was only when I got to my parents’ room to look for my phone did I realize Aiden had followed me.

“What’s going on Reece?” he asked

I put a hand to my head as I tried to remember where I had put my phone.

“Reece.” His voice louder.

“What?” I snapped, scanning the room and I couldn’t find my phone.

“Stop,” he said taking hold of my arms. “What’s wrong?”

I blinked. My eyes stung and a lump formed in my throat. I swallowed hard, trying to keep myself from having a meltdown right then and there.

“What is it?” he asked, softly. “Let me help you.”

I nodded but I still couldn’t speak for fear I wouldn’t be able to pull myself together.

“I need you to tell me what’s going on?” his tone was strong and comforting.

My eyes watered and a tear slid down my face. My bottom lip trembled.

“You’re scaring me Reece. Say something,” he whispered.

“It’s my mom… she’s in hospital.” I sobbed.

All the emotion I’d been bottling the past few weeks overwhelmed me all at once.

He gathered me in his arms and hugged me. “It’s okay,” he murmured.

I cried even though I didn’t want to. I wanted to be able to get my shit together so I could go to the hospital with the stuff my mom needed.

Just when I calmed myself down I pushed away from Aiden. “My mom fainted and… she’s in the hospital…uh she bumped her head pretty hard.”

“Stop,” he commanded, taking hold of my shoulders. His leveled his eyes with mine. “I’ll drive you to the hospital.”

I shook my head. “Why are you even here?” I asked, coming out of my panicked haze.

“Let’s get you to the hospital in one piece and we can talk later. Okay?”

I nodded. The most important thing was getting to the hospital. Everything else could be dealt with later.

“I can’t find my phone,” I admitted.

My mind felt scrambled and I couldn’t seem to think straight.

He scanned the room and found my phone which was on the side table. “Here.”

“Thanks,” I said, feeling relieved

He ushered me out of the house, and into his car as I held onto the duffel bag.

He drove to the hospital in silence. I was fine with it, I wasn’t in the mood for talking. The only thing on my mind was to get to the hospital to see my mom.

Aiden took the bag from me when we got to the hospital and went in search of my parents.

I was relieved to see my mom awake and sitting up the hospital bed as we entered the room.

“Mom,” I said rushing over to her it hug her as tight as I could.

Just being back in the hospital where Lacey and been was enough to bring back all that stress on whether she would make it through or not.

I knew my mother was going to be okay but it had definitely scared me. Scared me in a way I couldn’t explain.

“I’m fine Princess,” she whispered emotionally.

“What happened?” I asked when I pulled away slightly to take on the paleness of her features.

“You’re mom had low blood sugar and fainted.” He gave my mom a disapproving look. “She needs to make sure she eats more regularly.”

“Mom,” I said, feeling a lecture coming on.

“You brought a friend,” my mother, diverting the attention away from her.

“Aiden,” I introduced to my parents.

He stood into the doorway.

“Come in ,” my father said, shaking his hand before taking the duffel bag Aiden offered him.

“It’s nice to meet you Aiden,” my mother said.

I could already see the intrigue in my mother’s eyes but I didn’t even know what was going on between us. He had been avoiding me for the last week before showing up on my doorstep. I had no idea why he had come to visit me.

“Nice to meet you too,” he said. “I’ll wait outside for you.”

He left and I turned to face my parents’ curious gazes.

“He seems nice,” my mother spoke first.

“He is a boy. They are hard work.”

“Hey,” my father said, taking offense.

“You’re the only exception,” I said hugging him.

I waited until visiting hours were nearly over before I left parents in search of Aiden. It was the fear of why he had come over to my house they kept me from going to find him earlier. He was sitting in the waiting room and when he spotted him he rose to his feet.

“How’s your mom doing?” he asked

“She’ll be okay. They are only keeping her over night as a precaution.”

I shifted from one foot to the other. “Why did you come over to my house?”

Whether I wanted to hear his answer or not, I needed it.

“Could we rather continue this conversation anywhere but here?” Aiden surprised me by asking.

“Sure,” I said. “My dad’s going to stay a little longer but I was going to head home.”

“I’ll take you home,” he said.

It was awkward following him out the hospital back to his car. Silence hung between us on the ride back to my house.

Even when we arrived in my driveway we still hadn’t said anything to each other.

He parked the car and switched it off. I glanced in his direction, unsure of how to proceed.

It felt like everything that had gone on between us from the beginning to now had led us to this point.

“I listened to your message.”

“But I left that a week ago.” I frowned.

He shrugged. “I was too angry to listen to it at first.”

I studied him. His eyes met mine.

“Nothing happened between us.”

“I know.”

“Then why were you so upset?” I ventured.

“I didn’t like how you avoided telling me Max was on his way over. You were trying to get me to leave before he showed up. It felt like you were trying to hide it.” He looked away. “And then when he said he was there when I should have been…I saw red. It felt like he was implying I wasn’t good enough for you.”

I fidgeted with my hands. “He was there to help me when you weren’t answering my calls.” He had been the person I had chosen in my time of need and that meant something to me. Did he even realize that?

“I was angry you hadn’t picked up my earlier calls.”

“I was upset that I had been trying so hard to make things work and no matter what I did it was never enough.”

“I just mentioned that maybe the timing wasn’t right, that’s all.”

“I know. That’s what upset me. It felt like as soon as things didn’t go your way you were walking away again.”

“It wasn’t like that. It was a stupid comment, I was frustrated and annoyed.”

Silence settled between us.

“Why did you need help?”

I sighed. Maybe it was time to tell someone about Lacey’s excessive drinking.

“I went out with Lacey. She drank way too much and I needed help getting her home.”

“I thought I was supposed to be avoiding her so she could remember things on her own. Like the doctor suggested.”

I nodded. “Trust me she was so drunk she barely remembered anything the next morning.”

“Why didn’t you say something about Lacey’s drinking earlier?” His tone was soft and it reached the part of me that needed someone to care.

I glanced at him briefly,. “She is my best friend and I was trying to protect her. She has been to hell and back. She still can’t remember stuff. Could you imagine what it would feel like to wake up and not remember a portion of your life. It has to be a very scary situation and I’m trying to give her the space to work through it.”

“I get it. But what I don’t understand is why you didn’t tell me?” He almost sounded hurt.

“I didn’t want it to become your problem as well. Besides I thought I had a handle on it.”

He was quiet.

“But I don’t know if keeping it from everyone is the right decision anymore.” I let out a shaky breath. It felt like airing that secret had started to unravel everything. “I’ve been going out with her, making sure she doesn’t do something stupid or having someone take advantage of it. I was behind on my course work and add boy drama to the mix. I feel like I’m drowning Aiden.”

I looked to him but he was staring straight ahead. “I was trying my best to be everything everyone needed me to be and I failed.”

I bit my lip to stop myself from blurting out anymore.

“I had no idea you were under so much pressure.” He spoke and this time our eyes met.

I shrugged. “No one did.”

The silence stretched on.

He had at least allowed me to have my say like I had requested in my voicemail. It was time to end the conversation.

“Thanks for ride.” I made the move to open the car door but he stopped me.

“We’re not finished Reece.”

I turned to face him.

“I’m sorry I made things worse for you. I wanted to spend time with you but between school and Lacey I barely saw you at all. Maybe that was selfish of me but if you had told me about Lacey, it would have helped me understand your need to watch her so closely.”

“I was trying my best.”

“If you’d been honest with me, maybe things would have gone down differently.”

“And maybe if you hadn’t been insecure about Max it wouldn’t have escalated into a fight.”

“I’m not proud of my behavior,” he admitted in a murmur. “Even if Max said what he said to get a reaction I shouldn’t have taken the bait.”

“If I had been brave enough to see how I really felt about you and not allowed the guilt of cheating on Max to overshadow it maybe you wouldn’t have felt insecure.”

We could spend all day looking back at all the mistakes we made. But it was a wasted exercise because we couldn’t change anything in the past. Was any of this helping with our future?

My heart felt like it was squeezed tight every time I looked at him. I loved him. I swallowed slowly.

“I don’t know why it’s been so difficult for us when we both want this,” I said. “It should be easy.”

He shook his head. “The way I feel about you scares me.”

I stared at him. “Why?” I whispered.

“I’ve never felt like this before.”

“Same,” I said softly.

It was on the tip of my tongue to tell him I loved him but I held back.

“I can’t stop thinking about you.”

It was difficult to determine if it was unwanted thoughts or not.

“I know the feeling.” I stole another look in his direction. He was studying me.

“Our feelings should make this easy.”

The statement hung between us.

I shrugged. “Life is never simple, is it?”

Jealousy and some interference, bad timing, fear of heartbreak. They were all factors in our complicated relationship.

I could have left then, without telling him that he owned my heart. But one thing I had learned from Lacey’s ordeal and the fright I had received when my father had called to tell me my mother was in hospital. Life was short. And there were never any guarantees.

Time was precious, not to be wasted.

I could walk away without revealing how much I loved him and it would protect me in some way like I had tried to protect myself in the beginning when all this started. But sometimes you had to take a risk even when the odds weren’t good and even when there didn’t seem to be a way to fix things.

I kept thinking that if I had been as honest with him in the beginning like I wanted to be now than I could have saved ourselves a lot of angst, pain and time.

“I love you.”

I was shocked. The words were still on the top of my tongue. I still hadn’t uttered them.

With big eyes I stared at Aiden, my mouth slightly open.

“You love me?” I asked, not quite sure I had heard him right.

“Yes.” There was a confidence in that word that lifted my heart.

Time seemed to slow as I studied him. He loved me.

Like I loved him.

Yet he didn’t know that yet.

“Is this why you came over today?” I asked, still holding his gaze as the warmth of his words expanded in my chest.